Reorganisation Phase

It is now more than 3 weeks after my final assault on the enemy position. The fight had been decisive. We went in under full artillery cover, captured and held the objective. The enemy was very well entrenched. Thankfully even enemy trenches with strong OHP could not withstand our Photons bombardments. The enemy suffered maximum casualties and also most of our forward assault troops. All fire missions were danger close missions. Acceptable safety distances and precisions were ensured. Battle wounds and scars were everywhere. And battle fatigue is taking its toll. I don’t think I can withstand another intense assault like this. This was as much as I could take. No more. No more, I cried in my mind. But I must press home. I must maintain the momentum. Enemy defenses were beginning to break up. We broke in and fought deep into the objective. Deep penetrations into the enemy lines were achieved, thanks to the fire support. I took a look around the battlefield at others who were fighting their own battles. Many had suffered more than me. Most had suffered unbearable pain and nausea. Many cried and begged to be relieved. One combatant could not finish her fight and was pulled out of the battlefield. She must live to fight another day, another time. I could only encourage them to hold on, often reminding them that we have a bit more to go. Only a bit more to go. Come on Go! Go! Go! I could not let them down. I must bite the bullet. I must finish my assault. I would relate to our ARTEP physical tests. It is home run. I can do it. They saw my courage and thankfully held their ground.

The smoke cleared and the dust had settled. Reorg had been in full swing. I brought up more ammo and supplies. Did a full staff check and called up more reserved troops to take up occupied positions. I was told it would take a full two weeks to recuperate from radiation fallouts. Radiation in the objective does not dissipate immediate. It remains there killing everything in its range for the next two weeks. And my troops are still fighting from trench to trench. It now calls for close quarters combat. Hand to hand combat. Bayonets! Fire support cover had ceased. I must improve my immunization system as I can easily catch infections and inflammations. No soap, lotions or creams are allowed. No matter what ailment prevails. My body radiates heat even in air-conditioned environments. My skin is parched and brittle. I have prickly heat spots all over my body and I scratched like hell only to draw blood at each scratch line. And no toilets please. My rectum feels full all time and I suffered each time I did my business. I am drained of all my energy and I feel lethargic all the time.

I took two weeks off, doing nothing. Just eat, drink and slept it off. I went to Port Dickson for a nice and quiet weekend. I participated in the Relay For Life event held at Bukit Jalil NSC stadium. I also spent time to help out several of my fellow combatants who needed help most. I took my mind off the battle by reading heavily into photography. A new hobby for me.

I will know the outcome of my battle in a month’s time. I am fine now. I just know it. My body tells me so. I have been given a second chance at life.

Allen Lai

Lesson learnt No 13.

If maintaining health is expensive, try illness.

Power of the Human Spirit

Me and Ibrahim

Please allow me to share this little episode with all who only watch things happen. I still walk the talk in my last twilight zone. My Gunner spirit is forever unconditional. It is pure and genuine. The power of human spirit is an awesome experience. Many people would have experienced it sometime in their lifetime. I just did.

I always had a high quotient of EQ and compassion in me and I had applied myself well in a general way. When I became a victim of a life threatening disease, my quotients raised to another notch higher, particularly for those who were less fortunate than me in coping with our medical predicament.

I was doing my daily radiotherapy sessions in PPUKM Cheras (HUKM) when I met Ibrahim accompanied by his father Encik Mazlan. Ibrahim was sick, undernourished, frail and wheel chaired. Ibrahim had the classic profile of a very sick child suffering from Leukemia. Needless to say Encik Mazlan had looked even worse off. He had the profile of a very lost father. Lost for words, lost in his thoughts, lost in his esteem and lost for hope. Encik Mazlan had lost hope for his son Ibrahim because Ibrahim in a span of several years had three relapses of cancer cells lodgment in the brain, spine and now testicles. Chemo and radio therapies are not working well for Ibrahim. How many cancer relapses can a person take? How many cancer relapses can a frail child take? It is more often that chemo and radiation side effects would kill the patient well before cancer does. Encik Mazlan understood that.

It took two days for me to break through to Encik Mazlan. The first two days were always exchanges of a polite weak smile and “Selamat Pagi, ada baik ?”. Encik Mazlan would then shut down into his though, sitting by himself; Ibrahim waiting for the nurse to call his name for his turn in the daily long queue. From the third day onwards I had learnt more of Ibrahim’s medical conditions and the team of Oncologist’s fight to stabilize his Leukemia. PPUKM is a teaching hospital and a Specialist Centre. Ibrahim’s Oncologists are Professors and teaching staff. All doctors were on overdrive to make Ibrahim well. But there are always constraints in life. Encik Mazlan works as a billing clerk in a local TELCO company. He does not get government support and rates for hospital treatments. However Encik Mazlan is able to cover his son’s treatment under his company’s basic standard insurance scheme for lower staff members. Bone marrow and cell stem transplants are out of the question.

Over the week I had gained more confidence from Encik Mazlan and I was also able to put Ibrahim in a happy mood every morning by letting him play the games I had downloaded into my iPhone. In the course of our daily conversations, Encik Mazlan had told me something interesting. There was a full year that Ibrahim was well and his quarterly medical examinations and reports showed good markers. That was the year that Encik Mazlan’s neighbour had helped Ibrahim. He had provided filtered water for Ibrahim to drink daily from his new water filter system. All was well until Encik Mazlan had to relocate from his home in Kelana Jaya, PJ to Rawang for economic reasons. Ibrahim did not have any more opportunity drink filtered water since then, as the neighbour’s filtered water system cost about RM2500.00, with yearly maintenance cost to change the filters. Encik Mazlan could not afford it. Then Ibrahim’s cancer relapses came in one after another unabated.

I told Encik Mazlan, that he should provide the same filtered water for Ibrahim to drink daily no matter what it cost. Ibrahim was OK when drinking the filtered water. We had found out that his neighbour was using the RX WATER filter system from WorldwellnessSdn Bhd. A local provider in wellness products founded by Dato’ Dr. Noordin Darus.

I had suggested to Encik Mazlan to take a loan or an advance salary from his company to purchase RX water system. But he could not get his request granted for a small company loan nor advance salary. I told Encik Mazlan not to worry not to despair, I will think of something. I will think of a two stage plan for Ibrahim. Firstly is to get the RX water system immediately for Ibrahim and on a longer planning term, to source support for a Bone Marrow transplant.

I was troubled and worried but did not panic. What if I could not deliver my promise to help Ibrahim? I prayed for guidance and clarity of thoughts. I was no longer thinking of my own prevailing medical problems. My only thoughts were on how to help Ibrahim. I shared my thoughts with my wife and my daughter May Senn. I am Encik Mazlan’s HOPE. I must not fail him and Ibrahim. I must not.

I researched relentlessly in the internet into Leukemia and more into Worldwellness Network Sdn Bhd. I must contact Dato Dr. Noordin Darus. I know help is out there. But how do I talk to the company? More so, what do I talk about to the company? I called the company and requested for an appointment with Dato. The next day I had an appointment with his marketing staff who gave me the best returned call I had ever received in my mobile. Dato’ would see me, Encik Mazlan and Ibrahim on Tuesday 8 June at 11.00am.

My prayers were answered when the good Dato agreed to take on Ibrahim under hisDanaWellness programme. Dato gave instruction to his staff to issue a new set of RX WATER filter system, prescription for RX salt and RX Tra to Encik Mazlan. Dato also took time to explain to us his approach to cure Ibrahim. He will see to Ibrahim on a monthly basis. What more do we want? Dato Dr Noordin is God sent to help Ibrahim. We have achieved our first stage with God’s grace.

I have gained this inert power of human spirit in me. I have it, in part because of my upbringing and the close family bondage that I cherished; thanks to my parents. In part also due to my long career in the Army. But in a great part, it is due good friends and camaraderie with my running friends in Pacesetters Malaysia. They are the most selfless souls I know. After all running marathons is very akin to the human spirit. The sweat, endurance for pain and the sheer determination says it all.

Allen Lai

COMMUNICATING IN THE TWILIGHT ZONE

I read with interest some comments on postings made in this blog and I suppose I want to chip in my two cents worth. Most of us are in the proverbial "Twilight Zone". If you remember the narration of the then famous TV series, I am sure you know what I mean.

As Rod Serling narrates:

 "There is a fifth dimension beyond that which is known to man, it is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity, it is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears and the summit of his knowledge.This is the dimension of imagination. It is an area which we call- the Twilight Zone".

Imagine twenty years ago, if we were not prolific letter writers, then we were simply not in touch. Today, technology allows us unlimited communication in unbelieveable ways. Personally, I would like to read on experience,humour, regrets,achievements etc. The list is never exhaustive. Sheldrake was created for this noble purpose among the local gunner community. With the exception of vulgarirty and hate mail, I suppose good communication is always appreciated. Recently, I chatted up some young gunner Majors and I am impressed by their sense of camaraderie and enthusiasm of simply being "Proud to be Gunners". It is indeed heartening to see the spirit living on. On the other hand, I also notice how some senior retired officers became reclusive and chose not to actively communicate. I am a firm believer of living for the day and I suppose it is an individual's choice on how one wants to conduct oneself in "THE TWILIGHT ZONE'. So Zulu Zulu- keep them coming. I am learning much as ever especially from you.

"The way we communicate with others and with ourselves ultimately determines the quality of our lives."

- Anthony Robbins

Learning the Enemy Language

We are familiar with anti-aircraft, anti-tank, anti-personnel but anti-angiogenesis? What about apoptasis, metatasis, proanthocyanidines, and Coenzymes?  Wow, I hope I had spelt them right. I still cannot pronounce them though.

I did a crash language course just to understand the enemy. Big Charlie generally uses Greek and Latin languages, syntax and nuances. But I wouldn’t be surprise if the language used also contain some Sanskrit. It is highly recommended that we learn a word a day to be abreast with Big Charlie.

To keep this post as brief as possible, I link you directly to the US National Cancer Institute’s reference dictionary:

http://www.cancer.gov/dictionary/

 

Allen Lai

 

Lesson Learnt No.12

Nah, You already know this lesson.

Combat Ration

Having been in the front line for almost a year now, I am now convinced that our conventional combat ration is unsuitable to sustain current operations against Big Charlie. Conventional supplies in fresh ration and combat ration are adequately nutritious, but not necessary sustainable in new combat environments. This is now so with higher toxicity and pollution levels in every form of food, water, air and environment. New Carcinogens are being discovered almost on a yearly basis. Food scientists, Nutritionist and Dieticians worldwide are coming up with new studies to prove and encourage eating food that are specific to combating Big Charlie. In the wake of increasing numbers of new casualties to Big Charlie, there is a spurt of new findings in the properties of plant and animal foods. There are as many confirmed researches and findings as there are scientist interested in this field of research. So much so that there seems to be a lack of control and coordination of researches and findings by any central body. Most of the time I find studies contradict themselves and are inadequately and unsatisfactorily concluded.

My personal understanding is that, there is no one magic food or mineral that will be good for every person. What is good for some people may not necessary be good for you. My understanding is actually quite simple, as no two person has the same DNA, body chemistry level, body energy level, body toxicity level and oxygen level. For example the proverbial Jack Sprat who could eat no Fat and his wife could eat no Thin. And also there are more than 150 types of Big Charlie. Dr David Servan-Schreiber, who wrote Anti Cancer: A new way of life, Dr Patrick Quillin, author of Beating Cancer with Nutrition and Dr Colin Campbell of The China Study are some of the leading doctors in food research. Not to mention also of Dr Lai Chui Nam founder of Lapis Lazuli Light Resource Centers.

I find Dr David Servan- Schreiber’s work to be adequate enough as all other works concur with his. The following combat ration is good in fighting most types of Big Charlie (Not in any particular order of food values):

Green Tea for its Polyphenols and Catechins.

Turmeric (Kunyit) for anti inflammatory properties.

Ginger for anti inflammatory properties and being a powerful antioxidant.

Cruciform Vegetables for its sulforaphan and indo-3-carbinols.

Garlic, Onions, Leeks, Shallots and Chives being ancient medicinal herbals and has anti bacterial properties.

Vegetables and fruits rich in Carotenoids for its Lycopene and Vitamin A.

Tomatoes for its Lycopene, excellent for prostate cancer.

Soy for its blocking angiogenesis properties.

Mushrooms for its Polysaccharides and Lentinian.

Seaweeds for Fucoxanthin and Fucodian causing apoptosis in cancer cells.

Food rich in Selenium for boosting effects of antioxidant mechanism.

Flaxseed oil rich in short-chain vegetal Omega-3.

Sunshine for Vitamin D.

Fish rich in Omega-3 for its fish oils.

Probiotics for its friendly bacteria.

Berries for its Ellagic acid and Polyphenols.

Citrus Fruits for its Vitamin C.

Pomegranate Juice for its antioxidant and anti-inflammatory properties.

Red wine for its Resveratrol and Polyphenols.

Dark Chocolate for its antioxidants, Proanthocyanidines and Polyphenols.

 

The above list is extracted from Dr David’s book. Take sometime to understand and digest them. Boy, do I like dark Chocolates.

 

Allen Lai

 

Lesson Learnt No.11

Knowing what you eat is not as important as knowing what is eating you.

 

End of Mission

“The guns, thank GOD, the guns...” I borrow this Rudyard Kipling’s quote from the Gunners Club. I am really thankful to GOD and the guns. Today is the end of my fireplan HUKM Phase 2. I took the last fire mission personally. ZU1011. All guns firing with their barrels blazing hot. I observed full impacts on the target. I did not see any enemy surrender. The enemy will not surrender, they will try to hide to fight another day. I will not take prisoners. The rules of engagement in this front is unlike any conventional warfare. Kill or be killed. My enemy engaged me at the wrong front. The enemy underestimated me and he will pay for his mistake. I will not spare any quarters.

Phase 2 comprising 12 more fire missions took its toll on me and almost did me in. I could barely sustain Phase 1 with 20 fire missions. A total of 32 fire missions are a lot to take. I am glad that I am graded FE at my last PULHEEMS test. I am fairly fit before the fireplan. Others fighting in the same front with me, were in a worser shape than me. One had to do a modification and was stopped in the middle of her fireplan and she was evacuated to the base hospital. My whole terrain is drenched dry and the most sensitive point was closed for operation. I literally could not do my daily business in the morning and night. The pain I endure in each trip to the field toilet is indescribable. The torn and cut areas in between my legs caused by the rubbers of my running shorts would not heal as quickly as I would like them. I will have to continue to walk like a pregnant penguin for the next two weeks. I also have prickly heat pin pokes all over my terrain. I cannot apply any soap, lotions, creams or medications, as the radiation retained in my terrain will not subside for the next two weeks. My body radiates out heat and aches, I have short stressed spells of head spins and nauseas. Otherwise I am fine.

I was given medical leave for 6 weeks before I report to HUKM again. The CO of Oncology Regiment told me that all was well with my fireplan. However it will take up to 6 weeks before full intelligence and operational reports can be collected and collated.

I thank the HUKM personnel for standing by me daily. They had stood by me, and others with full dedication to duty and professionalism. They had no fear of the hazards in the frontline, nor were they affected physiologically by the daily interactions with combatants like me. And I admit that most others are really non- combatants and they had fear and despair in their eyes. Most untrained and unprofessional personnel will need constant counseling when facing such traumas on a daily basis. I salute the present HUKM staff doing their job. I will be glad to share each and every one of my medals with them. They had earned it as well. I brought a nice cake and some biscuits to celebrate my victory with them and my fellow frontliners. They appreciated my camaraderie.

I must thank my wife Peggy, for standing by me and my family. She deserves the KPK medal, a medal my brother John Lai received whilst in service many years ago. He described the KPK medal as 'just short of the PGB medal' as his bravery was not in the face of the enemy.

Finally I wish to thank you, my family members, friends and everybody else who had offered prayers and thoughts for me. A big thank you.

LESSON 10

ALWAYS THANK GOD.

War rumours

In the midst of my campaign I am bombarded with war rumours. This is bound to happen with the ease of access to the highways, broadbands, emails and internet. There are as many war rumours as there are victims of the war and survivors and caregivers. And there are even more war rumours coming from unscrupulous war scavengers, always ever ready to make money from casualties victims and survivors. These war scavengers will even sell junk technologies, nutrition’s and new magic cures. There is NO ONE MAGIC CURE. There will always be more disinformation than information.

All war rumours from victims and survivors from the war, are generally genuine and sincere, we should not discard them totally as they mean well. However they are always not necessary workable solutions. Unscrupulous corporations will use the vulnerability of victims’ want to survive. Victims want Hope. Any Hope. Unscrupulous corporations act like angels, but they are disguised in clever psychological and marketing techniques. Values in their products are hyped up stuff.

I am in part, a war rumour myself. I will continue to dig up war rumours in search of a genuine remedy for myself and other victims. But how do I separate the chaff from the stalk? I apply my own rules of engagement as follows:

1. Successful war rumours from survivors are generally genuine. They are worth a second thought.

2. War rumors supported by medical researchers are fairly good. However they need more independent researches and confirmation.

3. A good rule of engagement is not to take it in totality. Look for the caveats and motives of the rumour. Bad rumours will stand out like a sore thumb.

4. Always listen and read the fine prints and also in-between the lines.

5. I will be very cautious if it is a free trail as they are always filled with hidden costs. They say that there is no free lunch.

6. I am also apprehensive of some testimonials supporting the products.

7. I always test the products using the ‘truth of the matter test’.

8. If a person says it is 100% good, it is 100% junk.

9. I always visit regulated sources for information. My guiding foundation will always be based from Dr David Servans-Schreiber’s book ‘Anti cancer: A new way of life’

10. There is no one cure for all. If the product does not pinpoint t a specific type of cancer, it is to be discarded.

We should never allow our fears and hopelessness distort the truth of the matter. We do not have fears and hopelessness as help is always at hand.

Allen Lai

Lesson learnt No 9

GOD won’t grant us our wants, HE will always grant us our needs. We will have to work it out to get our wants from HIS grants.