Another Aha moment and they lived happily ever after

An ‘Aha moment’ is a moment when we suddenly get a bright idea all of a sudden. It is usually a positive thought to solve a problem.  Singing “Aha Aha I like it’ does not generate Aha moments. It just comes; more naturally to cunning people. And I am adequately blessed to be cunning since birth.

She was a sales promoter in Melaka’s new department store in the 1980s. She was 23 years old, matured and comes from Melaka. I was then commanding 1 ARTY. He was my pronto bombardier with my rover group. Twenty five years old, 7 years service, reliable and a good soldier.

They had been courting for more than a year when she agreed to marry him. But there was a social problem. She was Chinese and was brought up in a very traditional Chinese family. Although she had agreed to convert to Islam as required by intermarriages with muslims in Malaysia, her parents were adamant against it. Same sorry story.

Her parents had come to see me to stop my bombardier in this relationship. I had counseled the parents that there was very little anybody can do about it as both were adults and marriageable. More importantly they were in love and were prepared for any sacrifices or eventualities. They could just elope to get married, if they wanted.

The parents came several times to appeal and requested for my help to intervene. My bombardier was not prepared to abandon his love. And I really think it was a workable marriage, difficult as it would be. After several serious discussions, I managed to convince the parents to give their blessings to their daughter. Compromise they did, but not without very specific wedding protocols and a hantaran suitable to their culture and requirement. All requirements could be met without any problem except that the hantaran MUST include gifts that were considered haram. It was true that those items were mandatory requirements in pure Chinese traditional weddings and each item had its own significance. But a muslim just cannot purchase things that were haram, which included pork and liquor. A stalemate ensued. The family was sure that was the answer to their predicament. Fortunately their Aha moment was seriously flawed. My Aha moment was more potent.

Aha I thought, what if my bombardier would agree to his hantaran being in cash and I would arrange for a rombongan comprising non muslim soldiers to deliver the required items? My bombardier need not deliver the hantaran personally as I would conveniently deploy him on ops temporary. The Chinese family need not know of the arrangements. I budgeted the hantaran would be about RM2000.00 to which it was readily agreed to by my bombardier. He gave me the money and gladly went on ops. I prepared the hantaran to be sent on his behalf.

It was an adequately  face saving situation for everybody, and the Chinese family could not reject the hantaran at all, as the specified hantaran had met their requirements. The marriage took place after the girl was converted to Islam.

And they lived happily ever after.

Allen Lai